It’s no secret that relationships have been the cause of many of my generation’s worries. The number of parents who have had their teenage sons or (more often) daughters come home and tell them about the woes of their ‘love lives’ is through the roof, and has been for quite some time. I’ve never been in an ‘actual’ relationship before, so I’m not fully clued up on what it’s like, but here’s my $0.02 anyways.
I often see other Christian bloggers or YouTubers talking about how I should ’embrace the gift of singleness’. It often leaves me thinking: are you kidding me? Do you even know what it’s like? Sometimes it honestly feels like nobody wants me. I know I’d rather wait for somebody I genuinely care about than settle for somebody I don’t, but it really is a test of patience.
As always, a big question to ask is: what does the Bible have to say about all this? Quite a good bit, actually. Of course, ‘dating’ as such wasn’t a thing back in those times, but the approaches to relationships aren’t too dissimilar. In 1 Corinthians 7, the main message St. Paul gives is this: if you’ve found someone you like enough, and want to marry them, then go for it. But if not, then don’t bust a gut trying to find ‘that special someone’ (how much truth there is in that rhetoric I still don’t know). Revered social scientist Emile Durkheim recognised that marriage provides a safe outlet for sexual desires and frustrations – a ‘safety valve’ if you will – which Paul had referenced in the second verse of this passage almost 2000 years earlier.
So in closing, if like me you happen not to be in a relationship, don’t sweat it too much. There’s enough to worry about in life without finding a significant other/potential future spouse. I think if we focus on that stuff primarily, then if we’re supposed to be with somebody else, it will work out without us having to go out of our ways. And who knows, maybe God has made us single for a reason…